Thankyou ! You too :D
you too :)
Hi Emma x
Well hello there Emma!! Good to see you back!
hey Emma poppet, how's you? still kicking ass and fighting I hope? :) x
Well how about you
Kinda puppies u got?
The one left to re home is a staff x German shep. He is my baby bless him
The one I am keeping is a pug :) he is my baby as well, I love them like they are children but it's just not fair on them
Nite emsy :)x
you don't deserve any of it hunny only good things xx
Evening :) x
I sooo agree!
yup, with you there!
Yup lmao :)
That yup is really catching tho ain't it lol.. Every time I hear it I wanna say it lol.. :)
Yyyuuuuppppp and me ;)
same.. uni work is a bore :(
not that it makes much difference, I can't sleep anyway
Wish that's what I could tell my patients, they think they have it bad. Live in the real world, no bills, no stress, look if you didn't offend you would not be locked up... End of!!!!
hey poppet, how you feeling? wuggles xx
Hey I'm ok thanks u ok?
hello emma :)
Hi bex xx
Lol. I woke up to 94 notifications this morning. Way to go guys, new record! Haha
Nice one Emma! Really pleased x
good luck with the new job hon xx damn, are you having treatment at your own hospital?
No lovely I am a phych nurse, but 2 of the nurses are friends from uni that give me treatment but it's nice as I have ppl to talk to :)
Coolio :) can you come up and medicate me :p im thinking like itd be nice to just stay in bed for a few days on morphine or something stronger :D
If your one of those naughty nurses u have permission to do kimky things to me while im sedated :p
Its oryt i dont mind so long as theyre female :p welll then in that case i suggest you hurry up n become a doc n you can be my private physician and administer me :p
Man thats a big choice to make just to get you as my private doctor :p il do many things to confess my for another but self mutilation is prob on meatloafs 'wont do that' list :) ...you dont know that song do you :p
youVe been watching too much saw :p
Mmmm hot doctors :) yum :p
Haa ino im just being silly :p well and meaning doctors in general :p
Oh her!!i used to watch her couple year back in another tv show 'the vice' she was an undercover cop in vice squad was a good show. :) yea she's nice.
Haven't ever really got into holby, I used to watch ER the american one and I've never seen any others. I suspect it's good for you fo if you wanna be a doc!
My enjoyment of ER over the years has made me confident I can give anyone a tracheotomy :p
Ooh that sounds like a tough call to make! I guess he was trying to handle it himself n win her confidence n trust or something. Then get her to take it to the cops. Or maybe she didn't want it all out in public etc. she's a minor an it's rape
So I'd of thought with him in a position of trust etc with young folk he'd have to tell the cops. Or at least have a cop friend off duty go check it out or somin. What happened?
Ah I see!yea I get where ur coming from it may put people off chatting to docs. Maybe they showed it with him keeping it a secret hoping folk would buy into that then beable to tell there docs for real. I can get why it would
Be very hard for young girls to not beable to find someone to help them n be too scared to tell anyone especially if it's a family member etc doing it. It would just be all confusing n stuff. Shame. I quite like the idea of being an undercover cop
Catching rapists n child kidnappers n abuses n stuff I think out of all the crimes n stuff n bad folk those folk piss me off the most, like just floating around on the prowl an then taking some lil guy or girl that's just out
Playing n eating sweets n knows nothing of the bigger world out there n all that crap. It's not on. :p that's my rant over :)
I'm sure that was just wrong cop at the wrong time with you :) I think there's dif kinds. Like I'm sure a lot really are understanding and careful n truely wanna help people, all people n stuff :) maybe if they've been
Having a long shift n headache n really bad day n they just mess it up. I'm sure some have their uses for certain stuff like you shoulda got the other cops who were nicer n compassionate but that day you got the dickhead who's always too rough with folk
An uses his badge as a power thing . :) sorry to hear u had a rough time :)
Used to flashbacks? Yea I can imagine if your under severe mental stress in flashback anxiety panic etc etc n then the cops feel they can touch you n pull u about cause your not responding etc thatl infuriate you wild prob trigger of that
Fight or flight response n pump you with enough adrenaline to make you the hulks sexy green sister :p
Your not going to tell me are u what it is that happened huh!?thats ok maybe Intime ul beable to open up about it all more that's cool :) that's along long time to be feeling bad n reliving trauma!x I've got a wuggle huggle for ya :)x
It's not much but it's from the heart :)
16yrs of pain 16yrs of recovery n rebuilding yourself and il see you for coffee n a muffin when your 32 :p not to make light of everything all the time, yea that sounds tough. It's great it over fo now :) Oneday when everything's out n healed n
Buried ul still have a whole lifetime left to enjoy everything n itl be amazing :)x it's still young at 30 n I bet it's still young at 40 etc etc it's just a journey. By the time you do eventually reach a point in life n think Jee *** were freakin old
Youl barely remember the first 16years :)x there's nothing wrong with staying forever young alil bit in the heart n you can still do some child stuff then :) maybe instead of coffee n a muffin we should do ice cream n swings n spin on a roundabout :p
Haaa :) I've retained my child spirit pretty well while growing up :) I appreciate that I've still managed to remain idealistic n a dreamer n all that stuff :) alil naive at times but it's ok I'm strong il just beat up anyone who wrongs me :p
You think you Lost everything? The whole childhood experience! Do u mean mentally n emotionally or more the physical playing thing or both :)
I'm thinking if you can make your future as best as you want it, like fulfill your dreams n desires on what you wanna do like the little things n the big things too like doctor etc n always move forward
Youl eventually reach a place in the near future in your future where u have things u want n are the real true person inside that your spirits wants you to be
And youl find the power of your present place in time holds you from your mind forever looking backwards :)x
Something like that :p but I feel like it's true :)
You've come far in two years :) n 18s still young, your constantly growing n developing mentally youl be capable of mastering your own mentality n stuff :) if you believe in yourself :) which you do cause you went to uni n are out
Here on your own giving it a crack :) u can relive your childhood if you really want too :)
Oneday you may have a bf or someone really close to you :) then when you both have some free time he can indulge you in your missed childhood n you can play adventure golf putting n eat ice poles n fizzy cola bottles n go to the fairground n eat candy
Floss n push on swings n cycle on bike rides n anything n everything u fancy doing n itl be great fun :) then you can just switch back to young adult mode at night n get some dinner n a sneaky glass of wine :p
It's not the fun fun child bit you want it's the relationship with a protecter a loving father type to teach you to read n take the training wheels of your bike n protect you etc !? I don't remember any of those things it's too long ago.
Its oryt il not remember any of this in the morning :p haa if that's what u mean :) but I know someone who will haaa Emma when she turns on and has like a 200inbox :p
Sorry Emms :) x hugs x
Ooh ooh!!idea!!if your intent on a career as a doctor you could do sometime in a hospital in the children's wards n hey presto!! Making them feel btr physically mentally and enriching your own emotional needs at the sametime :) its an idea right :)x
Alternatively, you can move in with someone understanding n not have to pay a penny and work for a year or two or however long it takes at a nursery or play school n play with kids all day long till you feel more whole :)x
Younger kids treat u just like a best friend if you play with them , my best friends son is 3 and he totally loves me it's great he thinks I'm his friend not dads :p
It's pretty satisfying running about n playing with a kid n listening to all the crazy stuff they say as they experience the world fresh out the box every day :)
Well it wouldn't be permanent im thinking of it more as a holiday from life as you just try to get that experience you miss then when your ready youl be like "ok I've been in the sandbox long enough I wanna go out to dinner with a man :p
He didn't have to be a bf he was just a man lol a dr colleague :p yea ok I agree lol I wonder if shel read everything or just read the last one/two :p hey Emms :D
It was all iqra!!:p I tried to make her stop but she was having none of it :p
Wow you're a psych nurse? :)
Lol Steve that would be rape :p and psych nurses don't administer morphine if I remember correctly :p
Hahaha I'm going to work for the NHS (if it's still alive by the time David Cameron finishes with it lol)
No morphine for you (unless you chop your leg off) :)
Lol yep the guy had to chop his foot off :( he was a doctor too. And a hot one :(
But nope I haven't heard that song
Lol it was a guy :p
I only find male doctors attractive. But oh gosh, Dr Jac Naylor off holby city is so hot - enough to turn any girl into a lesbian lol
Google her. Her real name is Rosie marcel. She's so hot lol and I'm straight
Lol holby city sometimes shows things that irritate me.
Eg there was a GP on there that was sexually abusing his 15 yr old daughter. The girl told a doc at the hospital. And he promised not to tell anyone
What happened to Safeguarding procedures? BBC should not have shown that. Doctors do NOT keep things like that confedential.
It's giving the wrong message out. And the fact that they made a GP a controlling child abuser.. Totally wrong message. A GP is a position of trust. It is not okay for them to show one in that way
He HAS to talk to someone about it. It doesn't matter what his reasons are, he isn't allowed to keep something like that secret.
Yeah but he was a heart surgeon. If their reasons were to raise awareness, then it would've been a GP rather than a heart surgeon. And the doctor would have helped her instead of letting her go back home to be sexually abused again
Lol cops are useless. I was terrified having a very realistic flashback and the police had me pinned to the wall just because I wasn't answering questions like 'what's your name etc'
They were very aggressive with me when I was clearly terrified. I hate police now
They made the flashback worse. ***s
There was 2 of them there. They were a disgrace. They're lucky I haven't sued their arses. Lol
Lol I'm used to it anyway, it's just the police bit that made it worse
Yeah I have them 4-5 hours at a time. Most of my day is taken by flashbacks. It's REALLY bad
They're so realistic that it feels like its really happening and I'm back in the situation. :/
Lol yeah I don't really like talking about it but it was things that happened continuously for the first 16yrs of my life and stopped 2yrs ago
Lol that's 14 years away :( but I guess I'll never get my childhood back. Oh well lol
Lol. But seriously though, this has got me thinking. If it had started when I was 16, at least I would have had a childhood.
I've not done the things I should have done as a child.. and that's always going to have a hold on me. This is going to be way more complicated than I thought.
Yeah that's what I was thinking before. But what if I stop having these flashbacks and then end up very dependant and childlike. This is ***. I should've just gone into a foster home instead of trying to be an adult lol I was just 16
At least that way I could've had a bit of a childhood
Hmm. Not really because I'll never be 4 years old again and be looked after by an adult. It's just *** really. But anyway I should stop talking about it because I'm tired so things are coming out that I'll regret in the morning lol
Lol no what I need is a proper childhood including the fun that children have. But yeah sorry Emma :)
Lol not sure if that's appropriate.. doing a job to satisfy my own emotional needs. Think I need to sort them out before I become a doctor :)
Ew no I won't. I'm never getting in a relationship lol
We should stop giving Emma an overly full inbox lol
Good news then :D your gonna be oryt :)xxx
Yea thank god. I will live to fight another day :)
That's fantastic hon, sooooooo happy for you, I can uncross my fingers and toes now :) your good news has made my day xxxx
Thank you all guess what I HAVE A FUTURE aaahhhh :)
Well you gotta sick around at least 10 years to raise Wally :) big hugs hon xxx