I hate that too. So sorry to hear.
It's never a good option. There are always resources available to help if you look or ask.
It makes sense why you are having those thoughts. Money is very stressful. I know it has to be difficult, but like Jeff said, you can fix it. <3 it takes work. But you can ask a local social worker to help connect you to resources for money help. Or
ask someone else you know of. That's fixing a temporary problem with a permanent solution, and if you change your mind.. Well. You can't. Just keep holding on. <3 Life is scary.
Take a deep breath and step back from the situation for a second