4.8 avg
  357 days
  4350 hugs
  107 followers
2 Lydia R
4h ·
Skipping work again, want to stop existing but my remaining AD pills won't be enough to do the job.
Metron A
2h ·

*Hugs*

Metron A
2h ·

I think we'd like you to keep existing. Sorry today is hard. You can do it, we are here for you.

John T
2h ·

*Hugs*

John T
2h ·

It's hard to make yourself do anything when you feel this low, but I wish you all the relaxing feelings and good vibes in the world.

Kristina M
2h ·

*Hugs*

Kristina M
2h ·

Hang on..

Lisa L
1h ·

*Hugs*

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3 Lydia R
5h ·
Apparently I'm not suffering enough to be taken serious. Which of course might be a good thing, but it's so damn frustrating when no one ever listens to you.
Lydia R
5h ·

And even when you're dead people don't care. I hate this so much.

Jeff M
5h ·

*Hugs*

Jeff M
5h ·

That's a tough feeling...suffering, but not taken seriously. Try to find a doctor to listen. That's their job. Make sure they understand you need help. Or, at least, find someone to talk to...

Louise S
5h ·

That is really tough OP, my partner feels the same way about doctors helping. But it's important to keep trying

Metron A
2h ·

*Hugs*

John T
2h ·

*Hugs*

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4 Lydia R
7h ·
Overwhelmed with writing a letter to a friend. Why. This doesn't make sense. Slept for too long, didn't want to get up, skipping sports class, absolutely no motivation whatsoever.
Lydia R
6h ·

Meds not working anymore or other factors affecting their effect?

John T
6h ·

*Hugs*

Kristina M
6h ·

*Hugs*

Robert H
4h ·

*Hugs*

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5 Lydia R
1d ·
Don't know how to rate mood. Not feeling great, but also not really bad. Skipped uni and slept some more. Almost no guilt. Worrying behaviour. Overwhelmed with minor things again. No concentration.
Robert H
1d ·

*Hugs*

Martin C
1d ·

*Hugs*

John T
1d ·

*Hugs*

Jeff M
1d ·

*Hugs*

Kristina M
1d ·

*Hugs*

Metron A
1d ·

*Hugs*

Cindy M
23h ·

*Hugs*

Jen B
21h ·

*Hugs*

Tasha S
18h ·

*Hugs*

DesBear D
18h ·

*Hugs*

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5 Lydia R
2d ·
Again a *** night, but more energy today. Weird dream of old friends which made me contact them after almost 4 months. Still unfocused, a bit anxious, unmotivated, but finally did the dishes!
Alicia B
2d ·

*Hugs*

Alicia B
2d ·

Well done! It takes me a lot of willpower to do the dishes even on a good day 😁 apparently, when I was 6, I liked doing them. I wonder if I can get in touch with the little me.

John T
2d ·

*Hugs*

Jen B
2d ·

*Hugs*

Kristina M
2d ·

*Hugs*

DesBear D
2d ·

*Hugs*

Margot L
2d ·

*Hugs*

Metron A
2d ·

*Hugs*

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5 Lydia R
3d ·
So tired and hopelessly unmotivated. Will try to run some errands later and hope for a much better sleep tonight.
John T
3d ·

*Hugs*

Ted T
3d · NEW

*Hugs*

Lola J
3d · NEW

*Hugs*

Robert H
3d ·

*Hugs*

Tasha S
3d ·

*Hugs*

Lola J
3d · NEW

*Hugs*

Tasha S
3d ·

*Hugs*

Kristina M
3d ·

*Hugs*

Kristina M
3d ·

Same.

Cindy M
3d ·

*Hugs*

Silke V
3d ·

*Hugs*

Love 1
3d ·

*Hugs*

Jen B
2d ·

*Hugs*

DesBear D
2d ·

*Hugs*

Lola J
2d · NEW

*Hugs*

Lydia R
2d ·

Thanks for the hugs, Pandas! Besides washing my hair I did absolutely nothing. I took a 3-hour-nap in the afternoon and started feeling energy come back to me.

Alicia B
2d ·

*Hugs*

John T
2d ·

You washed your hair? What about the rest of them? Are they still dirty?

Lydia R
2d ·

You mean the rest of my body? I took a well needed shower on Sunday after cleaning my balcony in the sun and dropping sweat everywhere. ;)

Lydia R
2d ·

*dripping

John T
2d ·

The rest of your hairs!

John T
2d ·

You only mentioned one...

John T
2d ·

(I was being a silly ****)

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5 Lydia R
4d ·
Can't fall asleep, apparently I'm not tired anymore, thoughts racing, overthinking. Really thought the short night and today's physical exercise would guarantee a good night's sleep.
Lydia R
4d ·

Instead I'm lying here, overthinking, triggered by such a laughably minor thing, and trying to keep mood from getting lower.

Line R
4d ·

*Hugs*

Tasha S
4d ·

*Hugs*

Penelope P
4d ·

*Hugs*

Love 1
4d ·

Ugh.

DesBear D
4d ·

*Hugs*

Margot L
4d ·

*Hugs*

Jen B
3d ·

*Hugs*

John T
3d ·

*Hugs*

Tasha S
3d ·

*Hugs*

Cindy M
3d ·

*Hugs*

Lydia R
2d ·

Thanks Pandas! :)

Alicia B
2d ·

*Hugs*

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6 Lydia R
4d ·
Spent 5 hours cleaning my balcony, planting seeds and revarnishing my balcony furniture. Sun all the time, was sweating a lot and can feel my whole body now. Pleasantly tired and achy.
John T
4d ·

*Hugs*

Zoe K
4d ·

*Hugs*

Kristina M
4d ·

*Hugs*

Robert H
4d ·

*Hugs*

Cindy M
4d ·

*Hugs*

Line R
4d ·

*Hugs*

Tasha S
4d ·

*Hugs*

DesBear D
4d ·

*Hugs*

Lydia R
2d ·

Thanks for the hugs!

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6 Lydia R
4d ·
*** night (woken up at 00.45 and kept awake way past 3 am by loud people outside), but mood is strangely good. Motivated, but again unfocused. Just ordered a bag I've wanted for some time.
Lydia R
4d ·

Want to clean my balcony today and maybe even take a walk to take some pictures of the still blossoming magnolia trees. Already feeling overwhelmed by just two tasks, but we'll see how fast I am.

Martin C
4d ·

*Hugs*

John T
4d ·

*Hugs*

John T
4d ·

I like it when the magnolia petals fall and it's raining petals!

Mandy O
4d ·

*Hugs*

Anna N
4d ·

*Hugs*

Lydia R
4d ·

They are my favourite trees and the last two years I always managed to miss them in bloom, and this year almost too.

Alicia B
4d ·

*Hugs*

Alicia B
4d ·

Hope your tasks feel like fun :)

Kristina M
4d ·

*Hugs*

Kristina M
4d ·

Hope you'll have a good day

Lydia R
4d ·

Thanks Alicia and Kristina! Task was maybe the wrong word because I want to do it, but in the end it is a task, right? Even though taking a walk shouldn't be a task especially with this kind of weather! So far I've had breakfast and prepared lunch.

Tasha S
4d ·

*Hugs*

Cindy M
4d ·

*Hugs*

Lola J
4d · NEW

*Hugs*

nixiblu .
4d ·

*Hugs*

Jen B
4d ·

*Hugs*

DesBear D
4d ·

*Hugs*

Lydia R
2d ·

Thanks for the hugs Pandas!

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5 Lydia R
5d ·
Headache since noon, annoyed by people after grocery shopping, haven't got much done and pretty tired and unmotivated in the evening. Early night, mood is okay.
John T
4d ·

*Hugs*

Alicia B
4d ·

*Hugs*

Tasha S
4d ·

*Hugs*

Silke V
4d ·

*Hugs*

Cindy M
4d ·

*Hugs*

DesBear D
4d ·

*Hugs*

Lydia R
2d ·

Thanks Pandas!

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6 Lydia R
5d ·
Mood is good, sun is shining, people aren't too big arseholes for once, head is full of ideas, but it's pretty hard to focus and concentrate on one task. Want to do everything at once.
John T
4d ·

*Hugs*

Alicia B
4d ·

*Hugs*

Alicia B
4d ·

What a nice feeling, even though you're not focused.

Tasha S
4d ·

*Hugs*

Cindy M
4d ·

*Hugs*

McBee P
4d · NEW

*Hugs*

Natalia W
4d ·

*Hugs*

DesBear D
4d ·

*Hugs*

Lydia R
2d ·

Thanks Pandas! :)

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6 Lydia R
6d ·
More 5.5 but all in all a good day. Bit bored and bothered by heat at work, but alone with fav colleague, then spent 5 hours at friend's place and got fed with ice cream and fruits. Bonus cat cuddles.
Tasha S
5d ·

*Hugs*

John T
5d ·

*Hugs*

DesBear D
5d ·

*Hugs*

Keeping Track o A
5d ·

*Hugs*

Natalia W
5d ·

*Hugs*

Lydia R
2d ·

Thanks!

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5 Lydia R
7d ·
Feeling a bit more like a human again, and less like Ms Hyde. Period started, relieved, but I don't know how many more of these horror PMS I can endure.
Ivanova
7d ·

*Hugs*

John T
7d ·

*Hugs*

Tasha S
7d ·

*Hugs*

April G
7d ·

I can relate!!! The time before my period is hell emotionally

Silke V
7d ·

*Hugs*

Kristina M
7d ·

*Hugs*

Margot L
7d ·

*Hugs*

Lydia R
7d ·

Thanks Pandas! Nice not to want to die all the time. :)

Natalie C
7d ·

*Hugs*

Cindy M
7d ·

*Hugs*

Ivanova
7d ·

*Hugs*

Love 1
7d ·

I can't relate, but can only empathize and admire the strength of women to endure such fluctuations so regularly. I dont get enougg sleep and im grumpy. add hormonal changes, I'd be a mess.

Metron A
6d ·

*Hugs*

Jen B
6d ·

*Hugs*

DesBear D
6d ·

*Hugs*

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2 Lydia R
18 Apr 2018 ·
This guy is driving me mad.
Kristina M
18 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Kristina M
18 Apr 2018 ·

Can I ask whats wrong?

Lydia R
18 Apr 2018 ·

The guy living below my flat likes to turn up the volume of his music. Also raises my blood pressure to critical heights. I can't calm down or ignore it. I'd love to destroy something. Possibly his radio.

Tasha S
18 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

John T
18 Apr 2018 ·

Ive forgotten which way the time difference is again. You could complain if it's 22:25, that's too late to play loud music.

Lydia R
18 Apr 2018 ·

Yeah, it's way past nighttime peace, but you know. Social anxiety. I just want to curl up and die. I can't believe I'm the only one hearing it, but maybe I'm the only one bothered by it. Don't think complaining would help much though. People suck.

John T
18 Apr 2018 ·

If I got complaints about music at that time, I'd get kicked out!

Lydia R
18 Apr 2018 ·

Don't know how this works here but I doubt something will change. Don't even think I've got any right to complain. This used to be a rather quiet place. Now I can't even open my windows anymore. because he's smoking weed all the time.

Line R
18 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Kristina M
18 Apr 2018 ·

Did you tell him its bad for your health or did you say anytgibg at all?

DesBear D
19 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Tasha S
7d ·

*Hugs*

Lydia R
7d ·

I haven't talked to him yet, Kristina. He's only moved in a few weeks ago, then I was gone for two weeks so this week is the first time I actually experiece it. If I had talked to him yesterday I'd probably have ripped off his head, but now I'm

Lydia R
7d ·

feeling more rational again and will see how he behaves in the next days and then try and talk to him. If he won't change I'll have to call the police at some point. Which I'd rather not do. Thanks for your support and hugs, Pandas! <3

Cindy M
7d ·

*Hugs*

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3 Lydia R
18 Apr 2018 ·
More crying, insecurities and overthinking. Want it to stop. Want every noise surrounding me to disappear. Don't want to be so emotionally clingy. ***ing hate everything and most of all myself.
Lydia R
18 Apr 2018 ·

Don't know how long I can keep living here since the new very loud neighbour's moved in. So annoying, makes me mad. Feel like a breakdown is coming, everything has turned into a trigger.

John T
18 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

John T
18 Apr 2018 ·

Do any uni friends have a spare room? A few nights away would be good respite. If you explain how you are feeling to them, be assertive and ask them to help. It's what friends are for!

Lydia R
18 Apr 2018 ·

Can't ask anyone, don't know a lot of people and absolutely don't want to be a nuisance. Just have to endure it and hope I'll shut down at some point.

John T
18 Apr 2018 ·

Having someone to stay isn't annoying. It's called being sociable. Also if a friend needs help with something it's more than that. It's getting to show people you are a good friend. No harm in looking for alternative accommodation, though.

John T
18 Apr 2018 ·

Sometimes you can get a better flat for the same price in a slightly less reputable area. Worth it, especially if it's quieter.

Penelope P
18 Apr 2018 ·

Lydia, I totally understand. I've rented most of my adult life & moved 5 times in the last 8 years. In 2 places I had nightmare neighbours & it drags you down to the point of despair. You need to be somewhere safe & peaceful for your own sanity.

Penelope P
18 Apr 2018 ·

Your home is meant to be your sanctuary. Luckily my neighbours joined are just odd not noisy or horrible & the ones not joined are quiet & lovely. I hope you can find somewhere else where you can be content.

Faith K
18 Apr 2018 ·

Can you not ask them to quieten down?

Keeping Track o A
18 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Keeping Track o A
18 Apr 2018 ·

I agree with John's idea. Sometimes even one night away is a good break if you're not having a good time in your place for whatever reason.

Tasha S
18 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Line R
18 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

DesBear D
19 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Lydia R
7d ·

Thanks for your support and hugs, Pandas! Yesterdays's been hell for me, but writing with you has helped. John, I really don't want to move, so I'll try talking to him first. At one point I'll have to move but preferably not because of one arsehole.

Lydia R
7d ·

I also really like this part of Berlin and it's so close to uni. And I've only recently started feeling good here and now this... Thanks for your opinion, Penelope, it's the same for me. Home needs to be a sanctuary, and I can put up with most of

Lydia R
7d ·

what my neighbours do, but I've been so extremely irritable yesterday that everything was simply too much. Moving will be hell because you never know what kind of neighbours you'll get next. :/

Lydia R
7d ·

Faith, I haven't talked to him yet. He's only moved in a few weeks ago and I was gone for two weeks so I'm only experiencing his behaviour now. Yesterday I couldn't talk to anyone, but I'll try in the next days if it stays the same with the noise.

Lydia R
7d ·

KT, I just stayed a week at my parents and then a week in Glasgow, so that should have been enough time away. Just that I wasn't a neurotic mess back then. :') But still, I wouldn't know who to ask...

Cindy M
7d ·

*Hugs*

Keeping Track o A
7d ·

well keeping writing here when it gets too much for you! wishing you the best of luck! tricky housemates are not fun!!

Faith K
6d ·

All the best with the conversation

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4 Lydia R
18 Apr 2018 ·
Thank God for sunglasses. Can't keep away the tears and crashing feeling of hopelessness. Pressure on chest, irritated and overwhelmed by practically everything. Lonely. The person I want to talk to
Lydia R
18 Apr 2018 ·

is the person I feel like staying away from the most. I probably don't see is as equals. I'm always there if someone needs an ear to listen or some comfort but I can't imagine this in return from someone „close“ to me. All I can do is hide away.

Ivanova
18 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Piia P
18 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Lydia R
18 Apr 2018 ·

*is = us as equals

Jeff M
18 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Jen B
18 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Kristina M
18 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Kristina M
18 Apr 2018 ·

I feel the same..

DesBear D
19 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Lydia R
7d ·

Thanks Kristina, and all Pandas! <3

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5 Lydia R
18 Apr 2018 ·
First day back at uni. Feeling overwhelmed with all the people, noises and smells. Questioning every decision I've ever made. Don't really wanna be here, but at least the weather is great.
Tasha S
18 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Cindy M
18 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Ivanova
18 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Kristina M
18 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

DesBear D
19 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Lydia R
7d ·

Thanks!

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3 Lydia R
18 Apr 2018 ·
Dream of my brother being missed continued tonight. Took me far too long to realise he's at home sleeping. Hard to calm down.
Bam H
18 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Tasha S
18 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Cindy M
18 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Kristina M
18 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

DesBear D
19 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Lydia R
7d ·

Thanks Pandas!

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4 Lydia R
17 Apr 2018 ·
Overslept, skipped uni, low mood all day, physically exhausted, overwhelmed. Dragged myself to therapy and grocery shopping, but other than that avoided all human contact. Still angry & disappointed.
Lydia R
17 Apr 2018 ·

Lonely, isolated, and feeling like a stranger in my own life again. Back to overthinking. Just not really interested in life at all right now, everything's just kind of pointless. Don't feel like I belong or fit in anywhere.

Patricia S
17 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

John T
17 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Dave C
17 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Luke G
17 Apr 2018 ·

There is always a place where you belong to, and if you are a rare person, this place may be very hard to find. Keep searching.

Kristina M
17 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Kristina M
17 Apr 2018 ·

I usually feel the same. Good things is sometimes mood switches to the bright side.. so we should wait

Kristina M
17 Apr 2018 ·

Thing*

Jeff M
17 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

DesBear D
18 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Margot L
18 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Cindy M
18 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Lydia R
7d ·

Luke, I'm only a very ordinary person, but just accepting myself is too hard most of the time. I'm not sure if I've got enough time left to accomplish this. Kristina, yes, some days are really worth all this. :) Thanks for the hugs!

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3 Lydia R
16 Apr 2018 ·
Arrived safely back in Berlin, but disappointed by (non-) reactions of family and friends to „I'm back“ messages. Exhausted, annoyed, lonely, overwhelmed. Welcome back to Berlin.
Janine S
17 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Cindy M
17 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Cindy M
17 Apr 2018 ·

That's pretty rough. I'm glad to see you :)

Zoe D
17 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Lydia R
17 Apr 2018 ·

Thanks Cindy! I was (and still am) overreacting (pms woohoo), but I was looking for a bit of empathy (***ty Berlin public transport, tired, lonely) and only got indifference back. Still hurts a bit even though it's something so minor.

Cindy M
17 Apr 2018 ·

I don't think it's minor - I would be hurt by that too.

Lydia R
17 Apr 2018 ·

Well, I'm not even a priority in my own life so I shouldn't be hurt when it's the same for other people. Hormones are affecting me too much.

DesBear D
18 Apr 2018 ·

*Hugs*

Lydia R
7d ·

Thanks for the hugs Pandas!

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