I might get what you mean. I personally started becoming more assertive, and confronting people when they give underhanded comments. I non-verbally react if another peraon treats me differently. It REALLY helps 😊
I'm assertive to the point of belligerence to idiots. That doesn't stop me feeling bad, and very much relating to what Raasith had to say. When it comes to relationships I'd rather not put the other person, and myself, through that amount of stress.
Things change, so I won't feel that way forever!