4.3 avg
  313 days
  3774 hugs
  68 followers
January
MTWTFSS
1No Reasons2No Reasons3No Reasons4No Reasons5No Reasons6No Reasons7No Reasons
8No Reasons9(6) Not been on here for four months and not have I missed it!! Became unwell in September and had an episode of depression but feeling a lot better now I'm on Prozac
(5) Bodyclock is out of sync the past three days - asleep all day and awake all through the night ??
(4) A little low but just riding it through - not had a bath in 4 days due to sleeping so much ? so hoping a bath with my soap and glory products and music may help.
10(5) Bored - it's nearly 4am and can't sleep - ran out of sleeping tablets - haven't got any until tomorrow ? mood is stable though. Boyfriends making me a Horlicks ????11(5) Not left the house in a week but have to nip to the bank in the city centre - got anxiety - nausea and feel clammy ??
(5) On my way back home on public transport and my senses are really hypersensitive today - the smells on the bus are making me feel so irritable inside and feel like I'm going to throw up ?
12(6) Seeing my little girl for 2 hours - love her soooo much she's my world and makes me so happy ???
(5) Hate it when my times up spent with my daughter - going home - having a couple of drinks to de stress - hoping it doesn't turn in to disaster tho like usual ? wish I was a happy drunk ?
13No Reasons14No Reasons
15No Reasons16(2) Numb
(3) 4am agitated and crying because I can't manage to get to sleep - even after my sleeping tablet and sleep music / so sent my bf to get some brandy and coke from the 24/7 shop ??
(3) Regretting getting brandy but as seen as it's here now I'm obviously going to drink it - damn those impulsive decisions!!!! Not blaming impulse for drinking it as I had a clear choice on that part!
(9) Drunk = Green ?
(1) Ended up in hospital after having a breakdown when intoxicated
17(4) Slept all day again18(5) Feeling alright done some cleaning and had a takeaway - got to knock the drinking on the head again now. Going to try my best not to go through a drinking phase again
(6) Half five in the morning - still watching tv with my boyfriend - (he stays up with me :) in a good mood and excited to see my little girl tomorrow - energy is coming back slightly - back on my meds to
(5) 8.15am and still not been to sleep although I'm tired ?
(7) Finally feeling more stable with my mood and only been back on my meds (mood stabilisers and Prozac) for 3 days after a week not taking them - cosy watching to with BF - takeaway on its way ?
19(7) This time a year ago I couldn't concentrate more than 10 minutes watching tv - tonight I have watched 2 full movies on the horror channel - on for the third called 'chained' its a gritty thriller!!20No Reasons21No Reasons
22No Reasons23No Reasons24No Reasons25No Reasons26No Reasons27No Reasons28No Reasons
29No Reasons30No Reasons31No Reasons
March
MTWTFSS
   1(6) 2No Reasons3(4) No energy - been asleep most of the day got up at 5pm because I was up all night - so now I'm back out of my sleep routine - just ordered tons of food from the takeaway with BF Ready to comfort eat!!4(5) 5.30am - I've messed up my body clock again! So still up! Going to try and keep myself awake for the rest of the day.Going food shopping later today and going to try out some new recipes this week :D
(5) Can't believe I'm only just going to sleep at 8am ? Setting my alarm for a couple of hours time ? So I don't sleep all day again! Just hope I'm able to get up. #sleepproblems ?
(6) Yes! Managed to have a little nap after being up all night - didn't sleep all day today so should be able to get back in to a sleep routine tonight and have an early night
(7) Done the good shopping - spent loads so my fridge and cupboards are completely full ? lots of fresh meat and veg and a whole lot of goodies! I LOVE food and LOVE cooking ??
5(4) Feel so moody today - no reason - just woke up like this - going to the gym to try and release some of my irritability!!6No Reasons7(3)
(4)
(4) Went to visit my little girl at her Grandmas - she was in a bad mood but we still had a nice time together - she's been put on melatonin tablets at night time to help her sleep - G said she has been
8No Reasons9(2) really angry and moody for no reason. Been very snappy at boyfriend this morning - on my way to the gym - meeting my sister there - sat on bus feeling bad now for shouting at boyfriend :/
(6) Been gym with my sister apologised to bf he said he didn't take it personally and knows It was just my mood shift. Feel In good spirits
10(5) Woke up in an ok mood - not good but not bad either.
(4) Bad mood - going out to get some gifts for my mum. Want to go to the gym but no energy. Going to go to the sunbed shop to use the sunbed
(5) Feel a bit better. Got mums gifts. Had McDonald's - had a little gamble on roulette whilst out but managed to walk away once I lost a few times haha
(7) Feeling lots better now - cooking homemade Lasagne with a Greek salad! ? for me and my BF. I love cooking never realised until recently how it has a positive effect on my mood! Horror movie in 1hr ?
11(5) Had a good day at my mums with family for Mother's Day - no arguing for once. Just a little upset I didn't get to see my little girl today, not even a call/text from her grandparents
12(7) Bleached and washed my blinds - they are looking brand new again which I'm pleased with ? BF cooked me dinner Support worker came and is helping me get back on track with things. Meds taken13(5) 5am - not slept yet - been playing games on my phone ? Busy day tomorrow - shopping for new gym clothes, Gym, sunbed and food shopping. Hopefully I can get up easily in 6hrs! Been 12-13hrs recently14No Reasons15No Reasons16(5) On bus home from town and it's taking forever! My senses are very sensitive and sounds, smells and the lights are making me feel sick! Giving me a headache to17(5) Feeling a little numb18(3) Nervous for court tomorrow - little girls grandma is getting an order for her to live there until things improve with myself n mental health or until she's 16/18 :( feel soooo sick n nervous
(3) I've overspent this week and not kept in my budget so have to pawn my mobile phone in tomorrow until I get paid in 8 days - which means no internet connection and no contact with friends family etc
19No Reasons20No Reasons21No Reasons22No Reasons23No Reasons24No Reasons25No Reasons
26No Reasons27No Reasons28No Reasons29No Reasons30No Reasons31No Reasons
April
MTWTFSS
      1No Reasons
2No Reasons3No Reasons4(5) 5(8) The sun is out! Lovely spring day (finally) Ordered some new clothes and shoes for me and my little girl this morning - going to get my nails and spray tan done now ?? -best mood I've felt in months6(1) Had a drink but watched my intake all night -some how annoyed my boyfriend- usually blame myself for being drunk but I've not got drunk n not caused trouble/maybe I'm not to blame after all/vunerable
(1) I'm scared - I'm not retaliating to my boyfriends argumentative behaviour - he's stormed off to bed / I could end it all right now without a word or cry for help - I feel peace about suicide-isthisit?
7No Reasons8No Reasons
9(0) Heads all over - confused and numb - feel weird - like I don't know if I'm actually alive or dead - can't cope with existing anymore
(1) Tired and moody - going to have a nap ?
(5) My senses are very sensitive today - every smell, sound, taste seems intensified
(6) Been tired today - seen my little girl and had a great time with her - she makes me so happy - I never feel low when I'm spending time with her ?
(4) Moods dipped a little again this evening
10(4) Slept all day so back out of my sleep routine - only just got up at 3pm - still tired - moods low
(4) Got up at 3pm - went back to sleep at 4.30pm until 7.30pm - exhausted and low mood
(5) Took meds earlier after realising not had them for a few days - probably why my moods gotten lower - been snappy and moody with BF - watching films on Netflix and resting with BF
11(5) Lethargic and bored - no energy to do anything12(6) After a few days of no motivation I went to my app today with a charity called Breakthrough UK who help and support you to get back on track and get out and about doing courses etc I've signed up for13(5) 14(5) 15(5)
16(5) 17(5) Morning meds taken - I'm just lazing around - going to wash and dry my hair whilst I have the motivation to do it - as soon as I feel an inch of motivation I grab it before it suddenly disappears!18(5) Watching a documentary about Amy Winehouse
(6) Got through a day I've been anxious about for ages - had my induction to start an arts and crafts group on a Tuesday morning and finalised all the information to go ahead with my bankruptcy! Tired now
19(0) At my lowest - the hardest feeling Ive ever had -I don't want to carry on anymore - I have to though for my daughter - I will live with this pain just so I don't cause her suffering and pain.im lost20(5) My moods been shifting unpredictably - taken meds - sunny day today and feeling okish I guess21(5) Mess taken - been a bit snappy and had a little paranoia today - not been able to concentrate on tv but able to concentrate on repetitive games on my phone22(4) 9.30am and I haven't slept - up and down all night - only just starting to feel as if I'm ready to sleep - sleeping tablets being delivered tomorrow- I only take them when needed and it's time!
(4) My bruxism is happening quite a lot again whilst awake also - need to possibly get a mouth guard for when I'm sleeping - my jaw feels painful and stiff - found out yesterday my Prozac tablets may be
(6) Only had 3 hours sleep this morning after being up all night - feel fine though and in a chirpy mood ?
23No Reasons24(0) What's the point
(0) What's the point
25No Reasons26No Reasons27No Reasons28No Reasons29No Reasons
30No Reasons
June
MTWTFSS
    1No Reasons2No Reasons3No Reasons
4No Reasons5No Reasons6(0) I've had a tough few months and feel I'm now out of control - Im so erratic and making so many poor choices - come on here n noticed my last posts were very low and now im wondering how I'm still here7No Reasons8No Reasons9No Reasons10No Reasons
11No Reasons12No Reasons13No Reasons14No Reasons15No Reasons16No Reasons17No Reasons
18No Reasons19(2) my bf of a year spent the night away from me with friends last night - I was happy I pushed my paranoid thoughts away - but it's now 6pm the following day n no clear answer to when he's home and he
(1) Phoned my bf and told him I missed him n he said he missed me -- I asked when he was coming home and he said he didn't know - If that was me I'd do everything to make him feel secure of my plans!
(1) I've not been well for a few months - I stopped taking my meds because my mum said I needed to grow up n there's nothing wrong with me!! Obviously there is!! I tried telling myself I'm not bipolar!!
(1) Sorry for the rant - but i look after my unemployed bf and but his food and (alcohol) he lives with me rent free! All I asked was when he was due home and he said 'I dunno I will ring you later'
(1) Sorry for the rant - but i look after my unemployed bf and but his food and (alcohol) he lives with me rent free! All I asked was when he was due home and he said 'I dunno I will ring you later'
(
20No Reasons21No Reasons22No Reasons23No Reasons24No Reasons
25No Reasons26No Reasons27No Reasons28No Reasons29No Reasons30No Reasons