5.6 avg
  311 days
  1372 hugs
  22 followers
January
MTWTFSS
      1(4) Dark conflicting thoughts
(4) Meh
2(3)
(5)
3No Reasons4(5) Neutrality5(4) Guilt again
(5) Did some tidying so feel a little better
6(6) Watching marigold on tour and want to go to Japan7(6) I enjoy writing competitions especially submitting
(6) I enjoy writing competitions especially submitting
8(5) Heaven that is marmite on toast
9(7) First therapy in ages feel great10No Reasons11(6) Marigold hotel BBC doc is lovely
(7) Relaxed and happy - listening to CAITLIN Moran and playing sim city :) dressed up tidied have a meeting later in the month
12(6) Not as pumped but still alright :)13(6) Had a lovely chat with my sister - offer of cool 80's shirts14(5) Happily melancholy
(6) Playing scrabble with my love in bed looking forward to listening to my audio
(4) Incredibly bad mood
(4) Really not feeling it
15No Reasons
16(4) *rolls eyes* depression!17(5) Very tired but optimistic at least
(6) Glad I'm tired now at night - been a productive day writing - and nice dinner with partner
18(4) Stressed bed delivery gone tits up blocked in hall
(7) Recording session with Ken
19No Reasons20(4) Sudden mood drop
(6) Did the voiceover - a lot of fun, I think I need to do something creatively fulfilling every day, I wonder if I would feel good to do it for a month!
21(5) Surviving burns night social rubbish22(5) Feeling quite level
23(6) Therapy24(6) Good at distraction25(4) Anxiety and feel terrible about my weight
(5) Is it narcissistic to look at old photos of self to remind yourself you're not ugly? Needed reassurance
26(5) V insecure nonsense
(4) I wrote a reply to a pen pal they reacted badly - and was personal - I'm now v anxious
(4) Feel so weird today!!!!!
27(5) The usual28(6) Nice evening with the in-laws29(6) Feel relaxed
30(7) Off to London woohoo
(7) Off to London woohoo
(7) Off to London woohoo
31(7) Good interview with Kayden
February
MTWTFSS
  1(7) Tired but high spirits - joking away2(8) Lecture day3No Reasons4(5) Awful stomach bug but feeling okay5(5) Alright
6(6) Serene
(7) Please brother in law got a B in his dissertation that I helped with - phew
7(6) Calm :) got to do stuff but I can do it tomorrow8No Reasons9(5) Begin to think why am i doing any of this / just going through the motions of life
(4) Depressed
(5) Keep a witty conversation and amusing I guess in the face of misery and no work
(3) Weird arguments with partner :( so odd and horrible
10(4) Weirdest moods today
(3) Fear of flying anxiety is already intense and it's 10 hours away!!!
11(3) Going mad
(5) Cried spoke to partner
(5) Survived the plane journey with minimal anxiety
12(7) Florence holiday
13No Reasons14(4) Filling the day with errands I don't want to do really just coz I agreed and meh to fill the time
(3) Did the press thing for 42nd Street hate the whole charade of it
15(5) Grayson perry artistry
(4) Sick and sadness
16No Reasons17(5) Home18No Reasons19(6) Bodyflight indoor air dive
20(7) Bowls of fruit and yoghurt for breakfast is amazing21No Reasons22(5) Meh can't get out of bed
(5) Just doing some impromptu househusbandry
23(8) When you have a freeing thought and it makes you feel great coz you realise you don't have to emulate anyone or live up to some ideal you can just be yourself24(7) Producer in touch about this years show - excitement mixed with anxiety
(6) Good evening out but triggered
25No Reasons26(7) Productive day :) and lots of fun stuff to do :)
27(5) The listless feeling is upon me28No Reasons
March
MTWTFSS
  1(5) Really meh day2(4) Feel rejected3(6) Whisky
(7) Was in very good mood so I'm putting this here anyway....
4(4) Oh yes after dad ignoring me, triggered by disturbing things, misery lack of sleep and no attention from partner - I go quiet miserable and a forced social occasion5(3) Hyper / devastated at someone I trusted being 2 faced about my relationship complicit in law family behaviour
(6) Sing (the film)
(4) Just head ready to burst
6(6) Therapy is so important7No Reasons8(5) Hard day rehearsing - depressing conversation others are having just keeping on9(6) Fun at my family home had a nice nap :) got a long day of lone learning tomorrow bit anxious but won't think of that yet10(4) Spent all week on twitter but I doubt I've improved engagement such was my hope :S just a waste of time - and this rada audition
(3) I have a free rada audition tomorrow (would cost 89) and I had 2 weeks to learn 3 short monologues I haven't and I'm gonna just give it up!!!!!
(5) Feel delicate so will take it easy
(6) Had a nap watched a nice film
11No Reasons12(6) Up early - reading a good book - full of beans :)
(4) Really annoyed my friend is late to meet me she is usually late and I'm usually polite about it - but I feel like giving it another 10 minutes and going
(5) Anxiety but hope to do something productive later
13No Reasons14(7) My friend just told me how grateful she was for me helping her - she said words could not express
(7) Feel rather relaxed on the sofa this is bliss
15(8) Beautiful weather - went for a walk in the pleasure gardens and making my mum lunch :)16(8) Day with aunt ??17(6) Anxiety
(5) The thing is you're anxious so you have to be on your own for a bit but also I'm forgotten about a lot because people think I'm doing okay else wrapped up in there own stuff
18(6) Had a lovely time at the bfi flare19(7) That hairspray song 'you can't stop the beat' and adventure time has put me in a good mood
(6) Trying so hard for self compassion and thinking positive things about self even though the brain is raging negative and feeling bad - had a nice time with my partner for lunch and now I feel ugh
(5) Meh
(6) Ru Pauls drag race
20(2) Sick with existential angst
(6) Did some work :) an article Im quite proud of :)
(3) Just feel really bad - after effects of deep episode :(
(6) Reg
(6) Drag race
21(6) Lovely delegates reception :) and more ru Paul and writing - some hard stuff too but lots of lovely stuff22(4) Anxiety for no reason
(4) Terror attacks and likened to ugly people
23(4) Phone call from a work thing made me feel like a was found out for doing shoddy work
(4) Still anxious and below par - reading something on self esteem seemed enlightening
(4) Going on my overweightness :'(
(3) Really upset
24(4) All that is left is the little moments in life
(3) Train hellish and rattling
(3) Train hellish and rattling
(3) Lots of crying
25(7) Woke up super productive living in the moment
(5) Relationship!!! My partner the way he communicates sometime
(6) Feeling a bit more equal
26(6) Serene :) and calm saw amstells carnage
27No Reasons28No Reasons29No Reasons30No Reasons31No Reasons