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  335 days
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January
MTWTFSS
 1(6) Spent New Years on a phone call with my friends and then slept2(3) I'm really unsure. Not of anything in specific but I'm identifying myself going 'down' which is good because it means I have more chance of stopping it from happening. Unfortunately, I don't know the3(3) 3:08am. Bad. Bad. Bad. More lines. Why. Dont know. Had 'conversation' with mother, she told me to pi55 off in the end. I don't know what happened. Lost the plot.
(5) I've found an album recording of the 1960s production of Jeeves and Wooster. Rather good to be honest.
(3) Cried on the phone to my mother. She's at home by I can't stand to see her at the moment. But I have to otherwise nothing's get solved.
4(4) Decent time at Youth club. Glad for the distraction for the short period. Now I'm back with my thoughts, heevs chrisy5(6) Finally got round to watching Wilde and I cannot express at how beautifully made this was and that they could not of chosen better casting. Stephen Fry and Jude Law were phenomenal!6(5) Ask friend for tips on eating healthily because I'm too thin for my high waisted jeans that used to be too tight.
(5) Reading along to Mythos with the audiobook playing also. Decided I want to read but advance in the audiobook. Let's do it simultaneously.
(2)
7(3) Need to get my sleeping into check, I have to leave for school at 11:30am. And I've only just woken up after sleeping at 4am
(5) In taxi on way to school, not bad. Extremely quicker than a bus. We're already halfway there after four minutes.
8(5) Woke up 30mins before my alarm. Slowly getting back to a hewlthy routine.
(4) Different taxi driver. Headache. School made sure he knew where and to I was going to confirm it was a substitute. If we veer from home I'm bailing out the doors saftey first lads.
(3) Someone I cut out of my life can't grasp the concept I cut them it of my life. Gets all annoyed when I told them to leave me alone. Explained why I did it. Waiting reaponse.
9(2) Got CAMHS today, an emergency appointment and my mother is there. That's when you know you're truly smegged.
(3) In class, not looking forward to thing whole CAMHS thing.
(4) CAMHS worker is concerned for my well-being and mental health. Extremely concerned for the switches between angry and impulsive to somewhat neutral and a bit manic in my talking.
(4) I'm not one to really enjoy fast food, except the occasional Chinese but I'm craving a McDonald's and ugh I know as soon as I eat it, it'll just leave my body a few hours later. I just want McDonald's
10(4) Just confided in three of my teachers about yesterday.11(5) Waiting for Mr. Taxi man.
(3) Myself and a classmate had a moment in science. I left the class first and then she did, we both went warm and that makes us both feel crap. It was almost synced.
12(5) A fairly neutral day today, despite the moment in science and the row with my sister. Just doing some writing before I go to sleep, I wonder if I can lucid dream. Work tomorrow, can't wait.
(5) My twitter drafts are something else 'If a short person waves at you it's called a 'micro wave'.'
(3) Trying to control my anger with my niece pestering me about playing sims 24/7 is proving to be difficult
(6) Stood my ground and she's gone home crying.
13(3) Sick of my mood changing what seems every five minutes. Anger currently. Locked myself away for the day.
(5) Have my English Language Mock tomorrow, I hope I can associate the creative writing tasks with one of my interests. Otherwise I'm screwed.
14(4) 2:22am, no motivation to sleep, move or even get up. Had a high earlier, can I have another during the exam please. Mind you I'd probably get kicked out. CAMHS worker is getting another list on Tues
(4) Anxiety attack over my English mock I have today.
(5) Maybe if I convince myself I don't care about my exams I'll be alright.
(5) Had a sing song now I'm doing a lot better, bring on the day I hope it's good and I stay level within' my moods.
(7) I'm on a high not nervous but feel a bit off.
(7) English mock over, was on a high throughout the whole of it. Bloody Brillaint.
(4) Stopped revising, my back and ribcage hurt from sitting in one position taking notes and going over them.
15(5) I think getting the first major exam or of the way is the important thing. For me anyway, I'm oddly relaxed and know what to expect even though the exams are different each day ????? 5 bc neutral.
(5) Science mock went well, got 25mins of project left then therapy and then CAMHS.
16(4) Got a PIP assessment, allowed to skip school until my exam
(2) Left 24 out of 31 questions blank on my mock maths exam. Went outside on a phonecall to my mother and cried.
17(5) Just been told to log into MoodPanda, got washed with anxiety when it didn't log in the first time. Thankfully it logged in. I would not deal with loosing all my data.
(5) My aunts had a car crash
(3) Result of refusing work is building a dinosaur and colouring.
(3) Feel like I'm going to pass out and won't be home in less than five minutes (I'm going to my youth club but I don't want to because I feel this way.)
18(3) Been going to bed feeling ill for the past week, the day I feel okay in the evening I have the worst back ache I've ever had keeping me awake.
(3) Anxiety attack. I wish for it all to stop this isnt fair.
(3) Had day off from school, pains and aches left me feeling absolutely awful. Carried on throughout the day have only now died down.
19(5) Small ache in my theoratic spine, and dull ache toward the bottom. However it's nothing I haven't dealt with before and i have appointment on 6th Feb to get things sorted.
(5) Gotten another hamster, not sure what I'm going to call him
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21(5) I've currently got an urge to eat toast, toast is my new thing and I could binge on it if I had lost self control. I'm not sure why but this is extremely odd.22(4) Had a moment in maths, kept overheating and had to leave twice. I just said forget it in the end and stayed outside only returning inside to get my things to go home.23(4) Need to up my education game and excel on everything I'm failing on. Maths to begin with, also down to the watchers to teach me instead of constantly switching teachers every 30 seconds.
(5) So many things to fix, I need to fix my diet (so I healthily gain weight I'm a stick and it's taking its toll) my grades. Thankfully I have the doctors on Feb 6th do my diet I should be able to get he
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