Hopefully the world will seem brighter from the other side of all this, stay strong.
It feels... Liberating. Wonderful. Just... warm. I don't hate myself. I don't feel like I need to hide. It might come back one day but right now I'm feeling pretty good. My bestie has been a huge help in all of this. I feel like a whole new person
and I'm excited to see how we both grow and change with time. May there be a lot of it left for both of us.
Inspiring! Makes me feel really good to read this.
Thank you, Jeff and pandas :)
Love this! Glad you can see how amazing you are, Alicia! xx
phone, had an idea for making my current painting more interesting, laughed a lot. Just wish my bestie was here. Or I could go back home and he'd be there or something. Hopefully one day.
ordeal to be over soon. Hoping to be strong enough to make some big changes (yet again). I can hardly believe it will happen one day. But it very well might.
Hope it heals up properly soon. I didn't mean to hug again but sending hugs as always. Just read your other post and am glad to see its healing. Keep safe x
thank you, Tayla :*
You're always welcome x
I have gotten much better at dealing with those lately.
Glad to hear it
Well-done, Alicia. Glad you are making the most of it and reindulging in an old passion! 😊
Thanks guys :)
to sleep in a barrack with thirty other humans, to wear a uniform, to always be vigilant, to be cruel. And now you're back, and you've forgotten how to know what you want and who you actually are.
Do you really want to hurt people? Wouldn't you rather have your own room to sleep in? Do you enjoy doing as you are told without thinking? I'm only now learning to ask myself what I feel and listen to the answers.
I am a stranger to myself. Some days I'm not even sure I am a whole and real person, but the shift in me is already bigger than anything I'd hoped for.
Yesterday I went to a pharmacy, on an urgent matter. It felt so good to get out of the house! Breathe in the rain. So much more appreciated than a normal day, with no restrictions.
a hint of a whiff that maybe my significant other is not entirely obsessed with me just at the moment and the doors in my heart slam shut so fast and hard it gives my next door neighbours a headache.
have this longing for some kind of perfect love that will make my special someone keep banging on those doors long enough to have me loved back to health.
But thing is, I'm the one with the key. And those doors could withstand an atomic bomb to be honest. It's quite enough if they knock politely and I let them in and we have some tea like civilised people.
do know I need to change. It is grow-upping time. This defensive mindset has been depriving me of the very thing I want most. It's time to be brave. I can't predict what people will be like next. Maybe find some fun in that.
Straighten your back, Alicia, and go be vulnerable and free.
This should have been a four and simultaneously an eight.
I can relate to that.
I need to tell myself the same thing.
who are important to me. Some in Moscow, some in Sofia, some in France. My bestie some 1100 km away. That's the price one pays for moving around and being all cosmopolitan. I hope they're all going to be ok.
I'm worried for my loved ones too.
Hugs, Manda 🐼
Fly to us and fk the American
Make sure everyone knows how much i love them.
Great choices. I'd do the same, nixi, well, not with your American, obvs :)
Give so much love to my family.
It makes me sad to think that I don't know. Probably just hope that I'd go quick and painless.
work. He is overreacting, or maybe reacting to many things at once under a guise of reacting to just one thing. Happens to the best of us. Sad to see him in this state though. I've had three flashbacky meltdowns myself lately, but I've handled them
Ok sort of. No self harm, no ensuing depression. Awareness is everything. I'm just afraid that some things I couldn't handle. Like not having my bestie anymore. Oh well, I'll have to think about that if and when it happens.
that is beautiful
You are AMAZING!! 💞
Thank you, dear friends
using my Schleich horses and cooking. Been forgetting to eat all day, too. All of this didn't stop me from enjoying talking to my bestie at all.
I'll be ok. I can't even say it's been a bad day. Because I've got my lovey. It's going to be ok.
of spring. As time passes I learn, I become softer and kinder, a little wiser maybe. I find out big and small things about my love and about myself. I look forward with hope and a will to live, to fight and to create. I'm happy to greet this spring o
of 2020 because my soul is having a spring of it's own. And, frankly, there is nothing better.
This sounds amazing
Omg, I LOVE this! I'm right there with ya! xx