6.1 avg
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Woke up feeling ***, felt *** for half a day, but then all of a sudden mood swung up and I had a lovely night for no particular reason. A rare occurrence, I love it! When I think about what I'd like
Alicia B
1d · LEGEND

to change, I wouldn't want to have no BPD at all, I just wish I had more happy times. I know on MP I have a lot of green, but I sort of tend to give myself higher scores unless I'm totally dysphoric.

Alicia B
1d · LEGEND

I wish I was more often on 8, and less on 5 which for me is feeling meh and bleh.

John T
1d · LEGEND

*Hugs*

Didi A
1d ·

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Love !
1d · LEGEND

sounds like a universal human condition. We're in this together, sis.

Ann L
1d · GUARDIAN

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Anna D
24h · SUPPORTER

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Alyssa D
22h ·

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Jen B
15h · HERO

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The DBT program won't take me because I told them honestly how much I drink and they think I have lied and downplayed it. My bad German doesn't help. I'll call a different clinic tomorrow and tell
Alicia B
3d · LEGEND

them I don't drink at all, because this is ridiculous. I obviously won't have a heart attack without alcohol and not for into delirium tremens BECAUSE I NEVER DO WHEN I DON'T DRINK

Alicia B
3d · LEGEND

I'm pissed

Alicia B
3d · LEGEND

Pissed off. Not drunk.

Alyssa D
3d ·

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Love !
3d · LEGEND

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nixiblu .
2d · HERO

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John T
2d · LEGEND

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me M
2d · 1+ YEAR

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Finished the script for the final, ninth diagnostic criterion. Yay! A little dopamine feels good.
John T
3d · LEGEND

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Ann L
3d · GUARDIAN

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nixiblu .
2d · HERO

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What is more important, feeling less depressed or having orgasms? How do you guys balance a sex life and taking antidepressants? Do anti anxiety meds do the same to your body? I think anxiety is my
Alicia B
4d · LEGEND

main problem... It kind of pulls paranoia along with it, which is the worst!

Alicia B
4d · LEGEND

Are there slow release anti anxiety meds? I've been googling but it's somewhat confusing.

me M
4d · 1+ YEAR

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Alyssa D
4d ·

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Max T
4d · LEGEND

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Ann L
4d · GUARDIAN

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Love !
4d · LEGEND

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Anna D
4d · SUPPORTER

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Jen B
4d · HERO

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nixiblu .
4d · HERO

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John T
3d · LEGEND

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A very good day with no dramatic dips in mood. Talked to sis for a long while, went to E's relatives'place for a barbecue, then did some rollerblading.
Love !
4d · LEGEND

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John T
4d · LEGEND

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me M
4d · 1+ YEAR

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Max T
4d · LEGEND

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Ann L
4d · GUARDIAN

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nixiblu .
4d · HERO

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I was supposed to get a call from the DBT program this week telling me whether they would take me on or not. No call came. I am feeling very down and anxious. I wanted a chance to change my life bad.
Sarah D
6d ·

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Ann L
5d · GUARDIAN

*Hugs*

Lili C
5d ·

Fingers crossed...

John T
5d · LEGEND

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John T
5d · LEGEND

Can you ask your therapist?

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5 Alicia B
07 Apr 2021 · LEGEND
My mood drops, I say to myself: this is unpleasant, but it's ok to feel this way, even for no apparent reason. It will pass once it's done, but for now I'll sit in the sadness and worry. This is very
Alicia B
7d · LEGEND

helpful to me. I stopped blaming myself for feeling things that I don't like. As long as I act as a decent human being, it's all good. And I wake up the next day feeling happy and energetic, as if there was no mood drop. This is great!

Mandy H
7d · HERO

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John T
7d · LEGEND

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Ann L
7d · GUARDIAN

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Anna D
7d · SUPPORTER

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7 Alicia B
06 Apr 2021 · LEGEND
If you are not being yourself, you can never feel accepted. It takes bravery to be yourself, but everything besides that is pointless. Seems so obvious now, but it wasn't always. Love to all pandas.
Snail M
06 Apr 2021 · 6+ MONTHS

*Hugs*

Snail M
06 Apr 2021 · 6+ MONTHS

This is a god reminder. Especially when I'm tempted to not be myself because I want to be 'in'

Snail M
06 Apr 2021 · 6+ MONTHS

*good reminder

Ann L
06 Apr 2021 · GUARDIAN

*Hugs*

Ann L
06 Apr 2021 · GUARDIAN

Love to you πŸ™‚πŸ˜˜

Anna D
06 Apr 2021 · SUPPORTER

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Alicia B
06 Apr 2021 · LEGEND

Thanks guys 😊

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3 Alicia B
04 Apr 2021 · LEGEND
Mood went down brutally for no apparent reason, just been waiting to happen. Let it happen, didn't look for reasons, didn't try to intellectualise my way out of it. Cried. Went to bed.
Kestral H
05 Apr 2021 ·

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Ann L
05 Apr 2021 · GUARDIAN

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Mandy H
05 Apr 2021 · HERO

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Zainab O
05 Apr 2021 ·

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John T
05 Apr 2021 · LEGEND

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Jeff M
05 Apr 2021 · LEGEND

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nixiblu .
05 Apr 2021 · HERO

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Esther B
06 Apr 2021 · LEGEND

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7 Alicia B
03 Apr 2021 · LEGEND
Good to be home. Weekend at E's mom's was fantastic. She and I had a deep talk about mental health and love. His niece and I bonded big time. Also, I laughed my head off watching E and his brother
Alicia B
04 Apr 2021 · LEGEND

play Rocket League.

John T
04 Apr 2021 · LEGEND

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nixiblu .
04 Apr 2021 · HERO

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Lili C
04 Apr 2021 ·

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Anna D
04 Apr 2021 · SUPPORTER

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Anna D
04 Apr 2021 · SUPPORTER

It's great you have nice relationship with your in-laws!

Ann L
04 Apr 2021 · GUARDIAN

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Love !
04 Apr 2021 · LEGEND

*Hugs*

Max T
04 Apr 2021 · LEGEND

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Alicia B
05 Apr 2021 · LEGEND

Anna, it really is. Thank you

nixiblu .
05 Apr 2021 · HERO

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10 Alicia B
02 Apr 2021 · LEGEND
Amazing feeling of union and selflessness and love and peace.
Jen B
03 Apr 2021 · HERO

πŸ’—

Love !
04 Apr 2021 · LEGEND

It's one of the ultimate. Sometimes it just comes when we least expect it.

Love !
04 Apr 2021 · LEGEND

Sounds like a peak experience that you can trust to orient you. It is the ultimate joy that springs from within and connects us to the All That Is.

nixiblu .
05 Apr 2021 · HERO

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7 Alicia B
01 Apr 2021 · LEGEND
I've had an interview with a therapist in the DBT program in my clinic, and she said I was a good candidate and would probably be accepted. I'll get a call next week with a yes or a no. The DBT
Alicia B
01 Apr 2021 · LEGEND

program means 8 weeks of inpatient treatment when I won't be allowed to leave it have visitors (because covid). Also no drinking. When I told my therapist I felt like I wasn't sick enough for the treatment and felt like an impostor, she said 'if you

Alicia B
01 Apr 2021 · LEGEND

didn't need treatment someone here would have told you that a long time ago. You are here for a reason'. That felt so validating. I do need to learn DBT, I need to change in order for my life to change. I want to improve the quality of my life and my

Alicia B
01 Apr 2021 · LEGEND

relationships. I am scared of missing out on things. Like being there to see E's new business flourish or fail. I'm scared I will be forgotten in 2 months, I'm scared his family will treat me different. But all of that would mean they can't accept me

Alicia B
01 Apr 2021 · LEGEND

for who I am, and I need that. I accept people for who they are, and I deserve the same (see, I'm learning to say nicer things to myself). Only time will tell, but I need to take my treatment seriously.

Alyssa D
01 Apr 2021 ·

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Zainab O
01 Apr 2021 ·

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Shelley H
01 Apr 2021 · HERO

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John T
01 Apr 2021 · LEGEND

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Ann L
01 Apr 2021 · GUARDIAN

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7 Alicia B
30 Mar 2021 · LEGEND
Roller skated, feeling exhausted after two and a half hours. Nice to get out of my head though. Some intrusive thoughts, but E. is keeping his promise of not saying triggering things, and that helps.
Alicia B
31 Mar 2021 · LEGEND

It's really hard to admit to someone you have intense reactions to things other people (apparently) don't care about. It's hard to ask someone to change something they are used to.

Alicia B
31 Mar 2021 · LEGEND

I don't really feel I'm worth the effort, but that's not up to me, right?

Ann L
31 Mar 2021 · GUARDIAN

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John T
31 Mar 2021 · LEGEND

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Chloe G
31 Mar 2021 ·

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Jen B
01 Apr 2021 · HERO

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8 Alicia B
29 Mar 2021 · LEGEND
Roller skating again, weather is great, mood is quite good.
nat !
30 Mar 2021 ·

nice :)

John T
30 Mar 2021 · LEGEND

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Anna D
30 Mar 2021 · SUPPORTER

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Ann L
30 Mar 2021 · GUARDIAN

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8 Alicia B
30 Mar 2021 · LEGEND
A good day: sunny weather, skating, Chinese food, meditation
Love !
30 Mar 2021 · LEGEND

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Ann L
30 Mar 2021 · GUARDIAN

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Ann L
30 Mar 2021 · GUARDIAN

GreatπŸ’“

Tasha S
30 Mar 2021 · GUARDIAN

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8 Alicia B
28 Mar 2021 · LEGEND
Antidepressants or crystals ( they just help for meditation, I've not gone woo woo) or good weather, something is helping. Done some rolling, had a pizza. Making rolling progress. A bit tired.
Tasha S
28 Mar 2021 · GUARDIAN

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Spacekitten V
29 Mar 2021 · GUARDIAN

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Lili C
29 Mar 2021 ·

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nixiblu .
29 Mar 2021 · HERO

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6 Alicia B
27 Mar 2021 · LEGEND
A walk through freezing wind. Worked on my project, helped E. a little bit. A calm day. Didn't cry! Can't remember I day I didn't cry in months. Wow. I'm a humid one XD
Penelope P
28 Mar 2021 · LEGEND

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Love !
28 Mar 2021 · LEGEND

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nixiblu .
29 Mar 2021 · HERO

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Jeff M
28 Mar 2021 · LEGEND

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John T
28 Mar 2021 · LEGEND

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Anna D
28 Mar 2021 · SUPPORTER

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Anna D
28 Mar 2021 · SUPPORTER

Sounds like a great day πŸ™‚

Spacekitten V
29 Mar 2021 · GUARDIAN

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Mandy H
28 Mar 2021 · HERO

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Alyssa D
28 Mar 2021 ·

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Chloe G
28 Mar 2021 ·

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Chloe G
30 Mar 2021 ·

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7 Alicia B
26 Mar 2021 · LEGEND
Feeling better in general. Taking care of myself. I used be into mysticism when I was a tween, that is echoing now in my middle age. Using it to self-care, meditate and soothe myself.
John T
27 Mar 2021 · LEGEND

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Anna D
27 Mar 2021 · SUPPORTER

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nixiblu .
27 Mar 2021 · HERO

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Spacekitten V
27 Mar 2021 · GUARDIAN

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nixiblu .
29 Mar 2021 · HERO

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7 Alicia B
24 Mar 2021 · LEGEND
A nice walk and a nice talk, was feeling happy and bouncy. Not so much later on in the evening, but it was ok.
Love !
25 Mar 2021 · LEGEND

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Ann L
25 Mar 2021 · GUARDIAN

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John T
25 Mar 2021 · LEGEND

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John T
25 Mar 2021 · LEGEND

πŸšΆβ€β™€οΈπŸ—£πŸ“±

Spacekitten V
25 Mar 2021 · GUARDIAN

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Anna D
25 Mar 2021 · SUPPORTER

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nixiblu .
25 Mar 2021 · HERO

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3 Alicia B
23 Mar 2021 · LEGEND
Some things needed to be said. Some didn't. Ah well
Anna D
24 Mar 2021 · SUPPORTER

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John T
24 Mar 2021 · LEGEND

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Sami B
24 Mar 2021 ·

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Mandy H
24 Mar 2021 · HERO

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Max T
24 Mar 2021 · LEGEND

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nixiblu .
25 Mar 2021 · HERO

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