ah, the endless cycle of being terrified of your abuser coming back but also wanting them to come back because you need to be tormented to feel valid and also why the *** do they get to live rent-free in my mind if they've left me behind? Why the *** do they get to be free when I still jump at digital shadows? Come back and hurt me again you selfish ***
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get some rest ! <3

15 Jul 2021
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Almost lost my job because of sick days and also found out I can't have the first day of Bloodstock festival off work so life is great /s
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eh. it's wednesday already lmao i'm so stressed but not like,,, bad ig
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wow i'm so moody before caffeine lmao
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Love waking up dehydrated and barely able to keep my eyes open but she just gets angry with me because she's in pain
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lmao i almost sabotaged my way out of my relationship

I'm taking it you are wanting out of the relationship?

12 Jul 2021

No, not at all, I just self-sabotage a lot

12 Jul 2021

That must be rough..

13 Jul 2021
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she thinks she's the strong one but she doesnt realise that every time i have emotions because i cant take it any more it turns into this. i'm a horrible, disgusting person when i feel. i have to be strong or i'll turn into the monsters i thought i escaped and continue the cycle of abuse

i know just how you feel i am in the same boat

12 Jul 2021

Sounds rough.. No relationship is easy.

12 Jul 2021

that is for sure girl

16 Jul 2021
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Mostly just distracted myself with writing today. Days off are always a weight off if I manage to be productive
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Anxious, stressed, overwhelmed, too much work not enough work too much everything, I'm just sick of this, probably highballed the mood but lbrh the usual 1-10 doesn't apply to me like it does everyone else

09 Jul 2021
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