January
MTWTFSS
    1To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter2To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter3To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter
4To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter5To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter6To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter7To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter8To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter9To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter10To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter
11To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter12To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter13To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter14To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter15To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter16To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter17To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter
18To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter19To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter20To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter21To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter22To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter23To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter24To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter
25To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter26To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter27To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter28To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter29To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter30To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter31To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter
February
MTWTFSS
1To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter2To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter3To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter4To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter5To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter6To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter7To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter
8To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter9To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter10To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter11To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter12To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter13To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter14To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter
15(0) 16To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter17To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter18To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter19To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter20To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter21(0)
22(0)
(0) Hate myself. Feel nothing but pain and guilt. Want to end this.
(1) Found an anonymous chat and actually talked to someone.
23(0) Had some sleep after 30+ hours of insomnia. Woke up completely desolated.24(0) Don't have energy to do anything. Going for a smoke is the only way i breathe some fresh air for last i dont remember how many days. No anonymous talk today.
(0) Don't know if my sleeping pills worked right. Seems like I was just daydreaming, seeing some awful nightmares.
25(0) Waking up is so damn hard. Wish I could stay there.
(0) Finally went to college. Feel empty, don't even know what am i doing here. At least I'm done with debts.
26(0) Drunk again. Feel broken. Need some help.27(0) Trying to sleep, but it just never ends. 6:48 right now, have to wake up at 9 and it's just impossible to fall asleep. Why should I even close my eyes tho? I really don't know.
(0) Why does it keep happening that every time I want to make someone happy, to gift some warmth to smbd, to actually love someone I just keep causing pain instead
(0) Remembering those happy days which I ended myself is rather painful. Yet I'll preserve all those memories, as smth I'll probably never be able to feel again
(0) Don't know what to write. It's like I am just vanishing into emptiness
28(0) Why the fuck do I still exist? Unintentionally hurting people. Again. Over and over. Wish I've never been born
(0) Feel like an emty, boring shell. Tried to chat anonymously, every time I don't know what to ask and how not to be a stupid piece of shit. Everyone whom I talk to is bored and I can't even blame them
March
MTWTFSS
1(0)
(0) Want to go away but its heartbreaking to realize how much pain will I cause to my mother. But the problem is that I am causing not less pain with my fucking existence. Sorry pandas, feels really close
(0) Well, I'm at the college at least, but I can hardly think over anything, so studying totally sucks. Fucking insomnia.
2(2) Finally, had some long, restful sleep at night. I wonder, when will be next time, cuz not sleeping for 30+ hours seems the only way to get one3To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter4(0) And as expected, after I've slept fine, can't sleep several days in a row. Just let me fucking sleep, please5To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter6(0) My mother, the only person that was important to me, just called me a neighbour, not even a part of the family. Feel like the last part of me is dead.7To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter
8(0) ????? ??? ???????? ? ????????, ??????????? ???????, ? ???????? ??????, ????? ????????? ????, ????? ?? ?????? ????????, ???????? ????9(1) Talked with my mother for more than two hours, finally had a courage to give her the noose which I made for the darkest night, we also agreed to do some therapy, but I feel so unworthy now10To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter11To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter12To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter13To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter14To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter
15(1) Has just been to our college psychologist, talked for a while, she's quite a nice woman. She promised to find a good neurologist for me to start dealing with ny condition.16To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter17To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter18(4) She wrote me, the one whom I loved and caused a lot of pain, she even was nice to me, seems like there's still some hope19To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter20To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter21(0) Well, no. There's no hope, I am still a waste that can only harm the ones I love. Fuck it.
22To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter23To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter24To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter25(0) Don't have much to write about, feel like I just have to. It's like a heavy cloud in the head with a dark thoughts26To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter27(0) Sorry pandas for you have to read this. Tonight I tried to hang myself, wasn't quite successful, as you can see... Don't know what to do further, it's just all so fucked up. I hate myself.28To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter
29To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter30(1) Going to neurologist tomorrow, honestly- don't look forward to it at all, but I guess I have to start at some point31(0) I just fucking overslept my neurologist appointment because I coldn't sleep at night. How ironic.
April
MTWTFSS
   1To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter2To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter3To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter4(0) I am fuckng drunk and i fucking wanna kill myself
(0) Guess, when im drunk, i can tell evrything I fell like im dead, i hate myself, i want to stop all that
(0) Maybe i should start causing witn addixction
(0) Um sorr pandas
(0) Im so sorry
(0) I want to love, i want to gist smthwarm
(0) So sorry ...........
(0) Im so unworthy
(0) Plaese help me
(0) Plaese help me
(0) Someone plaese help me
(0) I beg you
(0) Pandas, seriously I don't know what to do further, i see only one option- killing myself
(0) But it fuckng huts
(0) But it fuhurts beimg an alochaolyx
(0) Alcoholic
(0) I want to stop,but i can't
(0) HELP ME PANDAS I NEED U SO MUCH
(0) PLEASE
(0) I wanna die
(0) PANDS PLEASE HELP ME
(0) I. Do sorey panfsd,
(0) I rwally shpunf syat fwadli g wigmyh alcohol sfficoyob
(0) I should start dealing alcohol addiction
(0) PLEASE HELP ME
(0) I wanna have a friend
(0) PLEASE PANDAS I WANNA KILL MYSELF IM SORRY<
5(0) I had a terrible, yet so interesting dream- about violence, love, suicide, it was very long- a couple of weeks, i guess, so i can't tell the details, just that at the end justice have been served6(0) Damn those thoughts are back. Can't remember when was the last day without them. What should I even do with them?7To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter8To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter9To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter10To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter11To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter
12To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter13To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter14To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter15To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter16To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter17To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter18To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter
19To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter20(1) Heeey, it's my birthday, and I'm still alive- don't feel any difference though21To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter22To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter23To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter24To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter25To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter
26(1) My groupmate promised to acquaint me with a girl who seems to be my soulmate, according to what he said about her. Tomorrow is the day, I'm a bit nervous and unconfident, wish I don't fuck all up27(1) We rescheduled a meeting for sunday, I'm actually surprised that I'm a bit excited- it's an opportunity to change a lot in my life, probably my whole lofe will change28To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter29To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter30To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter
May
MTWTFSS
     1To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter2To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter
3To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter4To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter5To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter6To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter7To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter8To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter9To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter
10To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter11To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter12To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter13To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter14To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter15To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter16To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter
17To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter18To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter19To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter20To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter21To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter22To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter23To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter
24To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter25To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter26To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter27To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter28To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter29To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter30To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter
31To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter
June
MTWTFSS
 1To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter2To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter3To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter4(0) Well, here I am again. Yesterday I was diagnosed with severe depression, been to psychoneurological dispensery today, was almost sent to mental hospital, but got lucky to end on day hospital just because Im already taking pills. Seems like a new part of my life starts here- what will it be like? Does it even matter? Well, I sleep and feel myself a bit better due to pills.5(0) Kinda dissolving in myself. Those antidepressants and neuroleptics feel really strange. I really recall that meme now where a man expects that everything will be amazing due to pills while in reality you are just blank and a bit stoned- well, still better than without them6To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter
7(0) Going to the day hospital soon for the first time. Kinda worried about it. Probably the worst week of my life starts now.
(2) I've been told that i have to spend 45 days in day hospital to get the academic vacation, and that's really not good, so i dismissed it and then my mom told me that it's not neccessary so I can just go through therapy and thats pretty fine, so everything is kinda ok
8To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter9To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter10To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter11To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter12To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter13To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter
14To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter15To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter16To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter17To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter18To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter19To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter20To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter
21To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter22To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter23To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter24To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter25To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter26To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter27To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter
28To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter29To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter30To view data older than 3 months, become a MoodPanda Supporter